For the imperfect Fashion lover.

Saturday, 15 September 2018

Why I've Stopped Hosting a Blog Link Up... the Truth!

If you're a regular reader you may (or may not!) have noticed that I haven't been running my weekly link-up recently.
In fact, it's been a few weeks since I shared the link-up and yesterday I cancelled it.

I wanted to give you the reasons for my decision.
The whole truth!

I originally started the link-up with the hope of finding new blogs and new bloggers, which (to some extent) I have.
The link-up has helped me find some new blogs to enjoy... BUT the honest truth is that it's no different to doing an online search for the topics I want to read about.

Much as I have LOVED reading your posts and having a good look at what you've been up to on your blogs, one small thing has been bothering me.

It's the fact that I go and have a look at your blogs and posts ANYWAY.
(I know that I rarely comment... it's mostly a time issue, or simply that I'm tired and have nothing to say that is worth reading, but I do love looking and reading and having a rummage through your work.)

So, the 'discovering new blogs and new things to read' has fallen a bit flat.

Then there's the automatic link dropping.

I'm not a fan.
I want someone to WANT to visit Fake Fabulous not just leave their links on a link up without even visiting my site.

I know it makes the 'numbers' look good but I'm not really bothered about figures anymore.

{Numbers did bother me when I started blogging but as time goes on I care less and less...
Of course, BIG numbers are always great to see but they're not the be-all and end-all of blogging.}

BUT, the main reason I am stopping my link up is that it holds me into a blogging routine.

Routine is NOT why I blog.
I come to my blog to escape the enforced routines of real life.

If my blog was my main job then I would, of course, be more regimented with time allocated to different tasks.
Routines would have to be laid in place and an organised approach to my blogging would be essential.

BUT... my normal day-to-day life is SO regimented and organised I just can't face it when it comes to my blogging.

I work in a clinical chemistry laboratory and everything is done by the book.
There is no room for individuality in a laboratory!

On top of that, I have a family to organise according to their timetables and routines.
My blog is my only escape from the pressures of life.

The weekly link up was starting to feel like an obligation.
A routine that I had to stick to.
A chore.

Blogging shouldn't be a chore.

I know that having a regular link up and a regular blogging schedule makes regular readers happy and encourages new readers.
I know it's the right thing to do to become a successful blogger.

But I know I'll NEVER make it big as a blogger... see why HERE.

So what I really want is my blog to be my safe place.
My sanctuary from the pressures of life.
A place where I share my ideas and thoughts... according to my own timeframe!

That's why I say "NO thank you" to most offers of collaboration...

Find out how to say no politely HERE.

When my blog starts to be a place I feel I "Need to write a post today" then it's over for me.
When you start to feel like you can't trust me then it's over too.
(Find out if you can EVER really trust a blogger HERE)

If you were enjoying the link up then I am truly sorry to let you down but you know there are MANY more fabulous linkies out there that you can join.

I would love to hear about your blogging journey and your attitude to blogging?
Are you hoping to make it big?
Is your goal to give up your day job?
Have you done that already?
Do you plan to make your fortune?

Or, is your blog your creative outlet?
Your place to share your ideas?
Your 'happy' place?

Please let me know what YOU think!
I'd love to hear.



  1. Just want to say thanks for hosting the link-up as long as you did, Samantha. So many of the link-ups are only for fashion or outfit posts, I rarely ever find one that accepts "just living" posts. It's nice to see be able to post my "other" content somewhere, and to see some "other" posts that are not just about clothes.
    My (little) blog has provided me with many happy hours of writing about whatever I choose whenever I choose, for absolutely no financial remuneration. After a long career in teaching, I'm done with living by the rules and by the bell, so to speak. I try to keep a loose weekly schedule. But when life intervenes, I may post a day or two later than normal, and when I'm travelling, my posts will be as time (and our trip) allows. So I get what you're saying and sympathize.
    Still enjoy your colourful and interesting approach to wardrobe planning. And much appreciate your writing this to tell us where "Fake it Till You Make It" went. xo

    1. It was a pleasure (at the time) Susan!
      I wanted and 'everything' link up because I think we can get blinkered to certain blog types and certain posts and there is a whole world of inspiration out there!
      I'm sorry it had to end... if only I had an 'assistant' to do all the routine bits and bobs and I could do the fun stuff like rummaging around blogs and writing about outfits! hahahahaha
      I'm glad you agree that rules need to be left at the door when it comes to our blogs.

  2. Blogging is absolutely a creative outlet for me! Several years ago, I thought about monetizing my blog, and I decided that it just wasn't for me. I don't have the energy or the focus to keep track of sponsors and partners and advertisers for tax purposes--there are too many other "have-to-do" items in my life for that. And for quite some time, I've blogged so infrequently that feeling a requirement to do it would take away from the enjoyment.

    1. I agree with you here.
      I'm so focused and organised at work that when it comes to blogging I'm like a flock of starlings.
      I never plan or organise, just writing about whatever catches my eye in the moment... it's much better that way!

  3. That's exactly why I stopped doing mine too. All that you have said about the above Samantha. That pressure to have that post out on time? I#m just not that organised! xx

    1. Oh I'm so glad you agree Laurie!
      I felt like I'd let everyone down... dropped the linky ball so to speak.
      I feel better knowing you can see where I'm coming from.

  4. I am not a blogger, but a reader. I appreciate your approach to blogging. Truth be told, I don't care about the linkups. I know the blogs I like and I follow them. If something catches my eye, I will click on it, but I don't appreciate being asked to clink on links. Furthermore, I am a plus size woman, and most blogs don't have plus size links. I read for the same reason you write, to go to a "safe place" as you put it, and escape from the pressures of life and timetables.

    1. This comment means so much to me Susan... and I'm so glad you feel that link ups don't matter.
      I appreciate your thoughts on being asked to click on links... I don't really like to be 'asked' to do anything when it comes to my blog. Life has to many obligations hasn't it?
      I was thinking about your plus sized links issue and you are SO right!
      I will try to find more plus sized examples of items in my outfits in future... thank you for the inspiration.

  5. I used to host a link-up (Shoe Shine!), but I gave it up after a year. I didn't like the obligation either, and I also didn't really like paying for it. Shocker, dear readers, those linkies are NOT free for us! I also disliked the obligation - and like you, with every comment I get, I check to see if that person has a blog and I'll go visit it.

    Although I didn't post to your link-up very often, I still enjoy reading your posts, Samantha. I never came here for the link-up, anyway.

    1. Ahhhh... shoes.... my favourite!
      I was trying on obscenely ridiculous designer shoes the other day, with a friend... we were laughing at the price tags on some (cheaply made but with a label) and drooling over others because they were so beautiful (can we sell our children we wondered?!?!?! :OP)
      I'm off on a tangent.
      Back to link ups.
      Yes, blogging costs money (shock horror)... hahahaha.... I think people often forget that we are providing content that costs money, whether it's web hosting or buying shoes for outfits, all for free... just for our own enjoyment!
      It's a bit crazy really isn't it?
      Thank you so much Sheila for your kind words.
      I often feel 'bad' for not taking the time to leave 'clever' comments but I always come for a nosey... just to see what you're up to!

  6. I’m just a reader who enjoys your blog immensely. You don’t owe me, or anyone, anything. I’m delighted every time you post. You, and your fabulous outfits, are beautiful treasures for me to enjoy. Thank you for taking the time to blog at all. You are such a treat for me!

    1. Blimey Kathleen.... your comment has made my day!
      Thank you so much.

  7. Your blog has been a great pleasure to me and was also where I first discovered fashion blogging. As a loyal reader of around ten bloggers I have seldom looked at the link ups. I don't want to devote more of my time to reading blogs.
    Your decision to opt out of FURTHER link ups works for you and so it's easy to support. Love, Jude

    1. Thank you so much Jude.
      Your support is enormously appreciated and I hope to continue to give you some half decent outfits to cast your eye over! XXX

  8. I think this decision will take a weight off your shoulders Sam; being under obligation to post does take the shine off it all. I always enjoyed your brilliant and colourful outfits but even more so your 'from the heart' posts. Just enjoy your escape route!
    Pamela x

    1. Thank you Pamela... these words really do mean the world to me!

  9. I have enjoyed your link up as well, but I totally understand the pros to letting it go. It does start to feel too much like an obligation, I always feel bad when I can’t comment on every post that links to mine but I do love having blogs to click on and read without having to search. Life is a bit crazy and my blog is also my creative outlet to share my experiences in my favorite medium...which is writing. Of course, I will still be hopping by Fake Fabulous to see what’s going on in your world even without a link up! Thanks for being so awesomely genuine!


    1. Thank you Shelbee!
      You always seem to be so full of energy, positivity and ideas.... and super-organised!
      I don't know how you do it!
      Thank you so much for your words of support.

  10. Good for you for listening to your own heart, Samantha, and doing what feels right for you!

    I feel TIME is our most valuable resource, we should all be spending it the way that feeds us best.


    1. I agree Bettye... Time feels like it is running away from me these days.
      It's a little scary!!
      Sometimes people are so worried about having a full life and being busy all of the time they forget to just be still and enjoy the moment.
      It passes in a flash!
      Moreso as we get older, don't you think??

  11. I have discovered some new blogs through my weekly linkup, but you are right it is an obligation. There are times I just want to not post and then I feel like I need to. I have gotten much better about saying eff it and posting a note instead.

    No aspirations about being a big time blogger, making money, or quitting my job here. This is for fun and when it stops being fun, then it is time to call it quits.

    Have a wonderful Monday, Sam!

    1. What a great way to look at things... post a note and eff it... I love that!
      I'm so glad you are on the same page as me Jennie... I feel a hell of a lot better about my decision now. XXX

  12. I totally get why you've given it up, Samantha. I considered starting one myself but decided against it for the exact same reasons you've stopped. I don't want my blog to become a chore at all. I really enjoy posting about my outfits, what books I've read, places I've visited to things I've cooked, etc and I'd hate for it to become something I don't like doing any more. A lot of the link ups out there seem to be full of people just wanting you to return their brief visit. I prefer my readers to come and read my posts purely because they WANT to!!
    Great subject, Samantha! I always look forward to your posts in my inbox :)
    Suzy xx

    1. Thank you so much Suzy... you are always very generous with your comments!
      I find it interesting that the reasons you didn't start are the reasons I stopped.
      I must admit that I did have my doubts at the beginning but always feel it's a good idea to give things a go before you write them off... some things work, others don't.
      I suppose it's a bit like reading... some books work some don't but we enjoy the journey anyway!

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  14. Hi Sam! I did wonder where it went. I do understand completely. I wouldn't be able to keep up with it if I had a full time job. I am home due to my disease, and I have time - and certainly there are times it feels like an obligation. I too, don't like link dropping and feel that people should take the time to comment if they stopped by your site.
    Anyway, no plans for superstardom, just expressing my creativity, meeting wonderful people and making connections. I enjoy your blog and will continue to stop by. I think its everyone's perogative to do what they enjoy and feels right!
    Have a great day!
    jess xx

    1. Thank you for your support Jess and words of wisdom too!
      I think you are spot on when you say we should all do what we enjoy and what feels right.

  15. Thank you Samantha for this post! Actually, funny thing is that I visit your blog from time to time because I like your posts (reading them) and color combinations youe create (I am a big color lover!), but I've never took part in you link up.

    My attitude towards blogging is exactly the same like yours. My blog is my hobby, my oasis. I very, very seldom cooperate with brands because it was never my goal. As soon as I cought myself with a thought "Oh, I have to write something, my readers are waiting" I noticed that it's blocking me. Although, I love my "self-development" part of my blog because I am a life and business coach, so those post are important for me and a big group of my Polish readers (I am Polish).
    Anyway, I am happy that you will still be blogging. I am always happy to pop in here fro mtime to time:). All the best, Renata xo

  16. I've always wondered about blog link-ups. I've been very picky about the ones I join. I'm not much of a joiner to begin with and like you, I hate the idea of having to be scheduled. I do find that link ups are mostly one-sided, benefiting the host. At the very least I do feel if you decide to participate or you are the host that leaving a comment on each other's blogs is simply good blogger etiquette.

    I had no idea people could automatically link without visiting your blog! How rude.

    I gave up on being a "good blogger" or rather a successful blogger ages ago. If is hasn't happened after some 12 years of blogging it ain't happening.

    Mostly now I blog to keep in touch with friends I've made or meet like minded people. I also promote secondhand shopping and thrifting. It's like spitting in the wind against rampant over consumption of fast fashion promoted on blogging but it makes my heart feel good.


  17. I had no idea that automatic link dropping was even possible! I totally understand why you've stopped doing the link up, I definitely feel the pressure sometimes to get two out a week, especially when work gets crazy busy. I have to say though that since hosting link ups I have less time to participate in them myself because visiting the blogs that have linked up and commenting is very time consuming. There's never enough time for everything!

    Emma xxx


  18. i had a blog once f0r several years it was about my life poetry I wrote etc. I finally got tired of it and took it down. love yours, u r so honest and my Anglo Saxon, french Huguenot, etc loves your descriptions and words love words, exp those that work. go for it. maggie


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