I think it is safe to say that most women (and men) want to look the best they can.
Almost everyone, hates the thought of looking like everyone else!
We all want to be the best version of our unique selves.
Everyone knows that other people make instant judgements about us, based on our appearance.
Whether you agree or not, right or wrong, it still happens.
Yes, I know you should never judge a book by it's cover.
I am all for getting to know a person, before I figure out what they are about.
BUT, we are all guilty of those instant judgements, aren't we?
That split second assessment of a person, and who we perceive them to be, really does matter.
It is important to let your clothes do (at least some of) the talking for you.
Express your true self (or your mood) through your outfit and style.
Make your moment count!
So, how can we find the confidence to dress the way we really want to?
To express our true selves through our choice of clothes?
There are 5 simple (ish) steps to a more confident you!
1. Surround yourself with positivity.
This is the most important (and potentially difficult) step of all.You MUST be positive when thinking about your body and your life.
Don't compare your figure to someone else's, we are all different.
This is easier said than done, I know.
Especially if your confidence is low.
So, think about someone you love, family or a close friend.
I bet you think they are beautiful...and I am also sure they are not 100% perfect, are they?
We each have our strengths and weaknesses.
As I have said before, some of the most fabulous and stylish ladies I know are far from perfect.
What makes them so fabulous and attractive?
A positive attitude and a big smile!
Don't compare your life to anyone else's.
Nobody's life is that perfect.
Anyone that makes out their life is all romance, and perfectly behaved children, is lying...or on serious pharmaceuticals!
Surround yourself with positive people.
Ditch those people who are always moaning and bitching.
Or, anyone that drags you down with their permanent negativity.
Especially anyone that puts you down...they are the worst!
If you can't ditch them (for example it's a work colleague or a relative) then turn every negative thing they say into a positive, put your own spin on it.
Or, try and steer the conversation the way you want it to go.
They will soon get the message, and either begin to modify their behaviour, or move onto someone else.
Be nice yourself.
Be nice to others.
Even if they do not reciprocate.
You will feel better, be happier, look happier and will therefore look better.
You can't lose!
2. Find some like-minded fashionistas.
This may seem obvious and easy, but it can be tricky.Most of my IRL (in real life) friends are not into clothes and fashion.
They find it boring and can't quite understand why my face lights up when talking (at length) about shoes or the latest trends!
If you struggle to get your IRL friends to talk about style and fashion, then look online.
You will easily find many like-minded bloggers and be able to interact with them.
Or, join a forum and start a discussion.
{I can't vouch for this, personally, as I have never taken part in a forum discussion, but I know many people do}
Your new online fashion friends will happily discuss the finer details of your wardrobe dilemmas with you.
Or, swoon over the latest colour combinations and shoe designs.
You can talk about what you want, for as long as you want, without fear of boring someone into a coma!
3. Pamper yourself and look after your body.
Look after the body you have.You only get one.
Don't worry about the body you you think you should have, or beat yourself up about your size/shape/age.
Eat good food (and not just "healthy")... a little bit of what you fancy does you good.
Drink plenty of water and look after your skin.
Buy a luxurious body lotion and pamper the body you have.
Don't hide your body away, cherish it.
Buy some good quality, well fitting and (most importantly) comfortable underwear.
Everything that follows will look and feel instantly better.
You deserve it!
4. Plan your outfits.
If you struggle to find the confidence to wear the clothes you want.Or, just end up grabbing the same old things every morning.
Plan your outfit the night before.
Lay out your choices, or hang them up, ready to put on the next day.
{I live in an unpredictable climate, so I check the weather forecast for the next day and start my outfit with the appropriate shoes. Sometimes I have an alternative, on stand-by!}
Lay out everything you need.
Right down to the fine details, like underwear and earrings.
Make sure you have tried on the whole look before you wear it.
This makes sure that there is no last minute panic and the outfit ends up getting ditched.
When you wake up in the morning, be brave and just go for it!
Being so organised with your clothes, leaves you enough time to enjoy another cuppa.
Or, spend more time on your hair/makeup.
It's a great feeling.
5. Fake it until you make it.
If you are still a bit wobbly, and find yourself tempted to ditch your pre-planned outfit and slip back into your usual look....STOP.
Take a deep breath, and go for it!
Once you have worn your new look a few times it will become easy, it is just a question of getting over that first hurdle.
Luckily, nobody else knows that you are not feeling 100% confident.
So, if you strut your stuff (and smile) you instantly look sure of yourself, and therefore fabulous.
- Fun
- Unique
- Positive
However, if you are not used to expressing yourself through your clothes, then you may be worried about looking odd or strange.
You might be thinking that there is a fine line between looking 'Unique and Interesting' and 'Wackadoodle'.
Looking Unique and interesting makes people notice you.
You will attract attention, sideways glances maybe?
People looking are not always thinking: "I wish I dressed like her."
But, they are probably thinking: "She looks cool/interesting/brave/arty/fun."
They may want to talk to you, to ask you where you got your shoes/bag/jacket.
Or, they might just smile and nod an acknowledgement of your fun style.
Looking Wackadoodle makes people look at you too!
Although, it is not always so positive
Wackadoodle, can look scary and intimidating.
People will be looking at you, thinking: "WTF?"
They are unlikely to want to talk to you...more likely to give you a wide berth, in case you do something unpredictable.
Sounds awful, right?
The difference between the Unique and the Wacko is not the clothes, it's the attitude.
As long as you are positive and nice, you will always look like that unique and interesting person. No matter how colourful or contemporary your outfits become!
Today I am wearing the comfiest jumpsuit, ever!
It does not even feel like a 'real' item of clothing.
I feel like a bit of a fraud.
Did I even bother to get dressed today?
{See this jumpsuit styled a little smarter, but still very comfortable.}
I wanted to be all-out casual.
Mixing my patterns.
Having fun.
{See this post about how to mix patterns}
The jumpsuit has a lot of great colours, and a bold pattern, so it was easy to clash (a little) with this part animal-part dotty, T-shirt.
Gold, metallic socks (it is cold!) and my black gutties were the perfect footwear for me today.
Casual and comfortable.
I am, of course, wearing thermal layers.
Fleece-lined tights and a brushed, thermal camisole.
I still need to be practical.
This fun bag finished my look off, perfectly!
Beware of the bum!
One last thing...Even the perkiest rear can look a little droopy, and start resembling an elephant's behind.
{My husband pointed this out once, and it made me laugh}
A pattern can help, by confusing the eye and hiding any imperfections.
Oh, and don't forget your pants (I mean knickers, for my Pants=Trousers ladies).
If they dig in, or there is any fleshy ooze, wear a thong or french knickers.
You could always wear a pair of tights (you know the ones with the cotton gusset) and ditch those pants all together!
Or, even spanx...if that is your thing.
{Please correct me if I am wrong; but I think that is how Spanx started out, originally. The inventor was cutting up her tights because she could not find the underwear she wanted}
Do you have any other tips to boost body confidence?
Do you always wear what you want?
Or, do you lack the confidence to express your true self?
Please share in the comments, I love hearing your thoughts!
Or, if you prefer, Tweet me @samantha4blair
Jumpsuit: WalG (this is nice, and has a sleeve)
T-shirt: Boden (similar)....this one would look fab!
Shoes: Guess (similar)
Shop this fun look:
A simply wonderful post that made my day! Thanks for linking it up with Vis Monday, and you look fab. xox
ReplyDelete-Patti
http://notdeadyetstyle.com
Thank you Patti! That means a lot. XXX
DeleteLove this post and I couldn't agree more that the difference between unique and wacko is confidence. This is a completely stellar look. I love the print mixing and the comfortable but cool vibe.
ReplyDeleteDebbie
www.fashionfairydust.com
Thank you Debbie...it is all in the attitude, isn't it? Thankfully, I figured this out quite quickly. IMO, style is 80% attitude 20% wardrobe. XXX
DeleteLoved this! Very well written Samantha : )
ReplyDeleteI've always said that confidence is everything and it is true.
bisous
Suzanne
It certainly is, Suzanne! Luckily it is easily faked if lacking. Thank you for your comment. XXX
DeleteYes, but even if people think "wacko"---at least you put some thought into your outfit and got them looking at you. I figure that's so much better than being invisible (in all black) or sloppy (in jeans & a boring t-shirt and (gasp) tevas)!! jodie
ReplyDeletewww.jtouchofstyle.com
I had to "google" Tevas....I can see how you would recoil in horror, Jodie. Hardly your thing at all! Hahaha.
DeleteThank you for making a good point too. Better to be looked over, than overlooked.
XXX
I do hope you didn't take my comment to say you are wacko!! I mean, you might be, but I think you look fabulous and you've opened my eyes to being more adventuresome in my styling ( i may not always show it on my blog, but I do try it in real life!!) love ya!!
DeleteHahahaha...no Jodie, I did not think you thought I was wackadoodle.
DeleteAlthough, as you say, I could well be! That made me laugh even more.
Thank you for your comments, I always enjoy reading them. XXX
Oh my gosh...such a cute look, dear Samantha!! The bold floral pattern of your jumpsuit is gorgeous...and it works unexpectedly well with the "sort-of" animal print of your top!! But it's those furry little "pets" you have attached to your bag that really caught my eye and made me smile!! Speaking of - it's so true that confidence and a smile are our secret weapons when it comes to great personal style...and you certainly have all that in spades!! :)
ReplyDeleteWww.StyleIsMyPudding.com
Thank you so much, Monika!
DeleteYou are very kind. This top is certainly an unusual print, neither animal or geometric. I like it but have struggled to find anything similar. As for my furry "friends"...Yes!! I love them too. I can't help but smile when they are around. XXX
Great outfit & great points, Samantha! You wear unique clothes perfectly!
ReplyDeleteTo me, it's helpful to try on a new outfit the day before or on the weekend to make sure it actually works somewhat the way I had been envisioning it. So often things look completely different in my head than in real life...
This is very true, Andrea! I always try on before the day (if it is a new item or a different style to my normal) to avoid any last second panic.
DeleteI find that shoes and tights need the most attention...they can look completely different to how I have imagined them, no idea why! Sometimes my feet look like barges, other times tights can change colour completely when on the leg. It pays to prepare, this is especially true if anyone is nervous or unsure. I suppose it is a philosophy we should apply to most aspects of life! Thank you so much for your comment. XXX
Beautifully put, Samantha, there's a fine line between interestingly adventurous and wackadoodle, and oftentimes, it's simply the attitude. That completely unapologetic attitude which you always nail down to pat :)
ReplyDeleteI adore this outfit. I don't own a single outfit that's completely print, come to think of it. All my prints and patterns are separates, I suppose that's how I justify purchasing them, i.e., I can pair them with something solid and not be afraid to face the world. But tadah, henceforth, that's where the wee voice of Samantha shall play in my head and say, relax, go do it!!! And I shall heed and obey GRIN
Relax and go for it...Yes, indeed Sheela!
DeleteAlthough I can't imagine you feeling unsure about anything. You always appear so confident. Thank you for your lovely comment. XXX
P.S I would love to see you in a floral jumpsuit, like this one. It would be amazing with your hair, beautiful curves and fabulous shoe collection!
Love your sense of fun in your outfits, Samantha! Fab pattern mixing!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing with Fun Fashion Friday!
OXOX
Dawn Lucy
http://fashionshouldbefun.blogspot.com
Thank you Dawn. XXX
DeleteGreat tips and I love the mix of patterns on you!! I don't own a jumpsuit only because going to the restroom is such a pain.
ReplyDeleteThank you for being a part of TBT Fashion link up and hope to see you soon!
Alice
www.happinessatmidlife.com
Hahaha...true enough Alice! Thank you. XXX
DeleteP.S I love the name "restroom", such a ladylike term.
I love these five tips--almost as much as the quirky outfit! The one I can seriously relate to is number 2. In real life, not many people get me like my online friends, like you for example!
ReplyDeleteGreat post Sam. And floral and leopard are a win-win. I need to remember this--especially for spring.
Love, Annie from Kremb de la Kremb